Breakfast of Hate

Every morning I begin the day wracked with self-loathing at my sheer indolence and readiness to be taken for a ride by capitalist demons Oatso Simple. For the privilege of putting 30g of oats into a small bag I pay 4 times more (58.9p per 100g) than if I had just weighed it out myself (15.5p per 100g) from a box of the same company’s oats.


Some of you might argue that half a cup of oats is the equivalent but the truth is that porridge is a delicate creature. The slightest imbalance of weight to milk to microwave time (not forgetting the individual wattage of the machine) can render porridge totally unpalatable so it’s worth getting it right. With so many different size cups in my mug portfolio it’s a risk I’m not prepared to take.